Why can't it ever be easy?

If I were to have blogged yesterday, like I intended to, you’d be reading a very different post. Yesterday’s post would have been cheery and hopeful. Today’s post is disappointing and upsetting.

As you all know, I started u/s monitoring on Sunday. Sunday’s ultrasound showed that there was 1 follicle on my left ovary measuring 14mm. I was happy, there was hope that this rushed cycle would actually accomplish something. Then yesterday I started googling around for success rates with IUI. I really should’ve done more homework before the IUI. In normal women (ie, no PCOS), they get more than one follicle when they use Clomid. So yesterday, after learning this pearl of wisdom, my balloon of hope got a little prick in it (and not the good kind), but I was still hopeful. After the u/s on Sunday I was told to come back in on Tuesday for another u/s and hopefully a trigger.

Well, today is Tuesday and the news is not good. I learned today that I now have one follicle on each side both measuring 12mm. WTF happened?!?!? So there is no trigger and this cycle is a bust. After learning this, the nurse sent me for p4 levels. There are two possible outcomes from the p4 results: 1.) I ovulated yesterday, so maybe the sex we had on Sunday worked (yeah, right-it’s never that easy for us infertiles) or 2.) my body is continuing its revolt and gave a big old, double fisted FU to the Clomid and said do not pass go, do not collect $200.

Any future plans are hinging on the p4 results. If it shows I ovulated, I suppose the monitoring schedule will have to be altered. If it shows I didn’t ovulate, I will insist on provera so I can be over with this cycle and request that my Clomid dosage be upped so maybe next time it will work. Do any of you seasoned pros out there have any other suggestions?

Damn Hope, damn her straight to hell!!!